Bricks Windows and Afghanistan

Reports are just coming in that the local MP's window and office have been smashed and trashed. The labour MP for Withering, Geoff Tindall has been contacted at his holiday home in the Algarve. Geoff is a radical socialist who tans easily. The police are looking for a hooded youth. That'll narrow it down. Unfortunately I know who did the dastardly deed, Pat the Pagan, our junior sub at the paper. Every time his mother goes away, this time she went on a womens' only poetry retreat to Tiverton, he gets hammered and does something stupid. The last time I had to bail him out of gaol for urinating on a statue in the middle of Withering Square. He got 100 community hours cleaning walls, and knows every graffitti tag in the valley. He said he threw the brick as a protest against Afghanistan. I said he hurled the brick because he was canned up on strong continental lager. Pat has now entered the paranoid guilt stage and wants to give himself up. If he does that he'll definitely go to prison for criminal damage. Our MP is from the hang em and flog section of the Labour party. I went round to Pat's house this morning and he was muttering some shamanic noises he uses to contact the spirits. I said the less said about the spirits the better and if the police find themselves a hooded youth before the weekend is out, then he'll need more than an inverted teepee, incense and crystals to get him off the hook.